Tamar - Ends

Genesis 38:28-30 As she was giving birth, one of them put out his hand; so the midwife took a scarlet thread and tied it on his wrist and said, "This one came out first." But when he drew back his hand, his brother came out, and she said, "So this is how you have broken out!" And he was named Perez. Then his brother, who had the scarlet thread on his wrist, came out and he was given the name Zerah.

This sounds like a very painful childbirth - babies popping out body parts and then pulling them back in - epidurals were not common place at this time. But the point is not lost:

Perez and Zerah were now sons of Judah - belonging to the tribes of Judah. Perez, who in all the confusion of being born, ended up coming out first and became part of the direct line of descendents for our Savior - See Matthew Chapter One.

In this Soap Opera storyline, Tamar became a grandmother of Jesus (great grandmother X alot) but a grandmother - nonetheless. Are we willing to do whatever God calls us to do - to further His kingdom, whether we know what the reason is or not?

Tamar - Mystery Solved.

Genesis 38:26-27 Judah recognized them and said, "She is more righteous than I, since I wouldn't give her to my son Shelah." And he did not sleep with her again. When the time came for her to give birth, there were twin boys in her womb.

Have you ever been wronged by someone and then, in that final moment when revenge is about to be sweet - they turn around with humility and say "I was wrong, and I'm sorry"? I don't know about you, but anytime I get an apology like that, the only response is - "Oh, okay." This was Judah.

When Tamar made that final call and confronted Judah with his seal and cord and staff - it really could've gone either way. She didn't know what he would do - he could've gone off on a rage at having been tricked, he could've paid off the messenger to be quiet... But God was with Judah as well. Judah admitted he was wrong to not give his youngest son to Tamar and that Tamar took matters into her own hands and set the record straight.

Now the latter part of verse 26 is something that catches my attention: "and he did not sleep with her again". Why? Why is this mentioned? Could it be to once again solidify the fact that this was, in fact, by the hand of God? It means that Judah was obviously not burning with passion for Tamar - and that is not the reason he slept with her outside the city. It means that he was now fulfilling his duty and taking care of Tamar (not for sex) - since that is what he should have been doing all along.

Then in verse 27, the mystery from before is solved. She was having twins! That's why she was so big at 3 months! It just goes to show that it really does not matter the circumstances, the trials in life, the way you've been wronged. God still wants the best for you and from you - and miracles still happen.

Tamar - In Your Face

Genesis 38:24-25 About three months later Judah was told, "Your daughter-in-law Tamar is guilty of prostitution, and as a result she is now pregnant." Judah said, "Bring her out and have her burned to death!" As she was being brought out, she sent a message to her father-in-law. "I am pregnant by the man who owns these," she said. And she added, "See if you recognize whose seal and cord and staff these are."

Now, I must say that Tamar must have either been really thin, wearing really tight clothing or having a very big baby - because she's not even three months yet and the grapevine is already spreading its way to Judah's house.

It was not commonplace to burn an adulteress to death at this time. Burn her skin - mark her - scar her - but not death. However, Judah is still all up in arms about his duty to supply her with his youngest son - which he still does not want to do. What a perfect way to get Tamar out of the picture than to have her put to death for sinning against his oldest son.

I wish I could have been there to see the look on Judah's face when he got the message Tamar sent. I would have been like "nanny, nanny, boo, boo" - I just don't think that's what this messenger did though. Judah was shown his seal and cord and staff (driver's license - remember) and his sin of that day - three months ago - hit him like a ton of bricks.

For those of us that are dealing with people who have wronged us, this is a perfect example of how God works out things for those that are faithful to Him. His promise is one we can stand on - even when it looks as if all hope is lost...

Tamar - Human Nature

Genesis 38:19-23 After she left, she took off her veil and put on her widow's clothes again. Meanwhile Judah sent the young goat by his friend the Adullamite in order to get his pledge back from the woman, but he did not find her. He asked the men who lived there, "Where is the shrine prostitute who was beside the road at Enaim?" "There hasn't been any shrine prostitute here," they said. So he went back to Judah and said, "I didn't find her. Besides, the men who lived there said, 'There hasn't been any shrine prostitute here.' " Then Judah said, "Let her keep what she has, or we will become a laughingstock. After all, I did send her this young goat, but you didn't find her."

Why do we get told that Tamar took off her veil and put on her widow's clothes again? I think it's to let us know that she is keeping her actions a secret. She immediately leaves and goes back to her house and her daily life without anyone the wiser.

Judah - in an attempt to "fulfill" his promise, he sends his friend to pay off his debt. Judah did not go himself - why is that? Was he trying not to see the girl again so he wouldn't have to be tempted? Was he feeling guilty and didn't want anyone to see him talking to her again? Was he afraid she was going to ask him for more than just a goat? Whatever the reason, he sends his friend who agrees to go. While he was there, he couldn't find her. The friend is forced to go into the city and ask around for the prostitute that was hanging outside the city. The men tell him that there had not been a prostitute outside the city.

Here's my question, how did they know there had not been a prostitute there? My guess is that all the "business" that was taken care of was happening inside the city were the parties were occurring. Judah is told by his friend that he couldn't find her and Judah says - "well, we did all we could". He didn't want the embarrassment of letting everyone know what he'd done.

I think that many of us act the same way. Instead of humbling ourselves and admitting that we've made a mistake, we try to scrape the surface and pretend that there is nothing more we can do. The truth is, God already knows exactly what we've done and when we try to act as though it's not a big deal - we're just fooling ourselves.

Tamar - It's Still a Miracle

Genesis 38:17-18 "I'll send you a young goat from my flock," he said. "Will you give me something as a pledge until you send it?" she asked. He said, "What pledge should I give you?" "Your seal and its cord, and the staff in your hand," she answered. So he gave them to her and slept with her, and she became pregnant by him.

So Judah promises to pay her with a goat. Now, a goat at that time - according to sources - went for 10 drachmas. An architect got paid 2 drachmas a day - so Tamar was being offered a weeks wages of a well-paid professional. Not bad for 10 - minutes (or so :)). However, it's a little disturbing to think that Judah has this type of disposable income and instead of offering it to Tamar willingly as his widowed daughter-in-law, she has to trick him into it. Nevertheless, this is not about the money - so I'll get back on track.

Because he didn't have the goat with him, he wanted to know what he could give her as collateral until he could give her the goat. Now turning tricks on credit may have been something done back then - but I'm sure it's not done today. Still, he gave her his seal and cord - the equivalent of his driver's license. It was a sure sign of his identity - exactly who it was that was sleeping with her.

Now look at the last 5 words of these verses. Remember we had mentioned in the last post about this being nothing short of miraculous. Tamar is pregnant! There are married couples who pay a years worth of income in order to become fertile and have children - Tamar gets one shot and 'bang' she's with child. God does work miracles - whether we want to see it as such or not - it's all in His timing - in His perfect plan - in His infinite mercy and grace.

Tamar - It's A Miracle

Genesis 38:15-16 When Judah saw her, he thought she was a prostitute, for she had covered her face. Not realizing that she was his daughter-in-law, he went over to her by the roadside and said, "Come now, let me sleep with you." "And what will you give me to sleep with you?" she asked.

There is so much to look at in these two verses that it is nothing short of miraculous.

Judah did not recognize his daughter-in-law on the street. How do you not recognize someone who was married to two of your sons and lived in your house - even if it had been several years? You think he would've at least found her familiar. The veil may have covered her face - but her voice? her mannerisms? . . . MIRACLE

Let's look at what didn't happen: Tamar is not "hiding" on the side of the road - she's openly pretending to be a prostitute - why is it that Judah is the only one to proposition her? Many people came to this event, and yet it does not tell us she had to turn away anyone . . . MIRACLE

What about the fact that Judah's supposed to be a man of God? Sleeping with prostitutes was not his habit. He had been married for a long time - it never mentions he was unfaithful and yet, shortly after the death of his wife - he boldly solicits sex . . . MIRACLE

Let's look at Tamar: I don't know about you, but if I had to talk to my father-in-law about sex, I might run from the room. But Tamar gathered up her courage and asks what he's willing to pay to sleep with her; and she didn't vomit . . . MIRACLE

Now I don't know if Tamar looked at this particular moment in time as miraculous. She probably saw it as a struggle or a last straw. What do we see during the struggles in our life? When we're down to our last straw? Are we able to see the MIRACLE behind it?

Tamar - Fashion Forward

Genesis 38:12b-14 When Judah had recovered from his grief, he went up to Timnah, to the men who were shearing his sheep, and his friend Hirah the Adullamite went with him. When Tamar was told, "Your father-in-law is on his way to Timnah to shear his sheep," she took off her widow's clothes, covered herself with a veil to disguise herself, and then sat down at the entrance to Enaim, which is on the road to Timnah. For she saw that, though Shelah had now grown up, she had not been given to him as his wife.

Judah was done grieving. Over, done with, out of his mind. Time to get the boys together and do some sheep shearin'. The thing about sheep shearing was that it was also a time of partying. Judah was over his time of sadness and now he was ready to have a little "fun".

Tamar hears of this upcoming trip. It doesn't say who tells her, or how much time she has to prepare, so let's discuss what happens here. Tamar takes off her widow's clothes - which apparently she has been wearing since her first husband died - Stacy London from "What Not To Wear" would have had a field day with Tamar. Anyway, she then puts on a veil and sits on the outskirts of the city waiting for Judah - she was attempting to look like a prostitute. My question is: where did she get the clothes to dress like a prostitute on such short notice? Now I may have one or two dresses in my closet that I think may be too revealing in public, but I know I don't have anything that could be misconstrued as something Julia Roberts might wear in Pretty Woman while she was 'on the streets'.

While waiting there for Judah to appear - guess who she sees - Shelah! All grown up, no less. Yet again, she was not given to him as a wife. The anger that must have festered inside of Tamar as she waited - maybe that was the fuel that kept her strong to her task - kept her from chickening out.

We all have situations that we do not look forward to, but we know it has to be done. If we can just let God be our fuel and keep us running through the storms and the troubles - we'll get through it with amazing results!

Tamar - The Reality

Genesis 38 11-12a Judah then said to his daughter-in-law Tamar, "Live as a widow in your father's house until my son Shelah grows up." For he thought, "He may die too, just like his brothers." So Tamar went to live in her father's house. After a long time Judah's wife, the daughter of Shua, died.

So Judah is sending Tamar away - telling her to go back to her own house -' you know, just until my youngest son gets older to fulfill his duty.' And then the truth is told to us when the scripture says "he thought he may die too, just like his brothers". Judah had no intention of letting Shelah give Tamar a child. Here's where our foreshadowing from before comes in - He was lying about Shelah.

Tamar, who has been trusting this whole time - doing what she was told by these wicked men who were supposed to be raised by a man of God - went home to wait.

This would not have been a joy to her family. When she walked in the door - used and childless and widowed - surely her family must have been disappointed. "But wait", Tamar must've said, "It's only temporary until the youngest son is old enough". That false hope we put in people instead of trusting in God.

Then in verse 12 - the truth is told. Judah's wife dies 'after a long time' - long enough for Shelah to have grown up. I think this might be where Tamar gets the realization that Judah has no intention of fulfilling his promise. That Tamar would be childless and live in her father's house. This must have weighed on poor Tamar. What was she going to do? It had been years and now, there was not even a woman left in the house to care for the household - what was Judah waiting for??

What a feeling in the pit of our stomachs when we realize we have put our trust in the wrong thing. We have wasted time in stress and agony when we could've given it to God. But God is always watching and working . . . Even in Tamar's situation.

Tamar - Rated "R"

Genesis 38:6-10 Judah got a wife for Er, his firstborn, and her name was Tamar. But Er, Judah's firstborn, was wicked in the LORD's sight; so the LORD put him to death. Then Judah said to Onan, "Lie with your brother's wife and fulfill your duty to her as a brother-in-law to produce offspring for your brother." But Onan knew that the offspring would not be his; so whenever he lay with his brother's wife, he spilled his semen on the ground to keep from producing offspring for his brother. What he did was wicked in the LORD's sight; so he put him to death also.

So, the time had come for Er to marry and it was up to Judah to arrange that (as was custom during this time). Keep in mind that this was not the same respect that Judah gave his dad, as he did not wait for an arrangement.

See what it says here about Er, not too much: God found him wicked and killed him. WOW. How bad must he have been for our loving and patient God who is just and forgives to outright kill him? And what about Tamar having to marry such a man as this. Even so, her husband (duty, job, etc.) did not give her a child - so as we mentioned before, someone else had to step up.

Judah told his second son, Onan, that he was responsible for giving a child to Tamar for Er. Couple of things here - there were no fertilization clinics at this time - no labs, no petri dishes - for this to happen, Onan had to have sex with Tamar. As we all know, pregnancy does not always happen on the first time around either. So, that thought alone that Tamar had to marry a wicked man at a young age to begin with - and then as a widow to sleep with her brother-in-law. . . yuck!

Onan, however, was not the man he should've been either. He did not want to give his offspring to Er - he was selfish and wanted his own line. But that certainly didn't stop him from having sex now did it. From what the Bible tells us - everytime he did sleep with Tamar he removed himself before his "seed" could reach her egg. How demeaning that must have been for poor Tamar. She knew the only reason to do this was so that she could get pregnant and continue for Er's children, but that would never happen if Onan kept doing that.

Turns out God thought that was just awful too, so Onan was "put to death". Now the Bible doesn't say how either brother died - it just says they were put to death. Perhaps a heart attack in their sleep, maybe they slipped and hit their head - or it could've been two completely different ways that they each died - However, one thing was for sure - they were both married to Tamar when they died. Judah had to notice that as well . . .

Tamar - A Woman's Place.

Genesis 38:2-5 There Judah met the daughter of a Canaanite man named Shua. He married her and lay with her; she became pregnant and gave birth to a son, who was named Er. She conceived again and gave birth to a son and named him Onan. She gave birth to still another son and named him Shelah. It was at Kezib that she gave birth to him.

There are many things to look at in these few verses listed here. Numero Uno: Judah married a Canaanite woman - not someone that would make daddy proud. Deux: The information that is given on her is very limited - we know her religious affiliation because she was from Canaan and we know that she was fertile. We are not even given her name.

It was very important during this time period to give your husband a son to carry on the line. Judah knew this - especially since it was his family that was so blessed by God and was promised to have many nations. So mentioning that she bore three sons, pretty much gives us her usefulness at this point. It never mentions her having any change of heart or doing something wonderful for the Kingdom - she was a Canaanite and she bore Judah's sons.

The last thing that I find very interesting is that it mentions where the last son was born. Why? Why is this land so signficant to mention? It is still in the lowlands of Judahs' territory - but here lies the pertinance: Kezib, by definition, means "Liar". The foreshadowing that is seen in these few verses can only be attributed to the Holy Spirit writing it - Can't you just hear the suspenseful music playing as the screen fades to black and the commercial comes on...

Tamar - The Setup

Genesis 38:1 At that time, Judah left his brothers and went down to stay with a man of Adullam named Hirah.

This if the beginning verse of the chapter that is going to introduce us to Tamar. It is important to understand a little of what has happened up to this point.

Judah is one of the sons of Jacob. Jacob is the one who's brother was Esau and their father was Isaac. Isaac was the son of Abraham and Sarah - remember the old couple and how Abraham was told to sacrifice Isaac? Now that we have the history, we can note that Judah is the great-grandson of Abraham.

A good portion of what is meant to be grasped here in this chapter would be lost without knowing the history. The story of Jacob (Judah's father) and his family is quite the soap opera - and I may go into that in a later blog, but for now - we'll talk about Judah - his son.

Obviously this man comes from a line of Godly men - I mean, he's the great-grandson of a man God promised would be the father of nations! Genesis 17:5-8 However, as human as we often are - so was Judah. When the verse states "At this time" - It's referring to the time when Judah helped sell his little brother Joseph into slavery - don't forget about ripping his colorful coat. Not only that - but he's associating himself with an Adullamite - remember what we said about hanging out with the wrong people.

We all make bad decisions - even as God's children- the question is, when will we realize it - and how many people will we hurt until we do realize it? Thus begins the story of Tamar...